and not ask other people for help unless I really need it. Conversely I try not to give help people may not want.
There are occasions on which we all need help so I accepted the offer of some help last weekend - for yesterday. I had to transport rather more than my large rear tricycle basket would allow.
It does not have to go far - notice "does", not "did". It merely needs to travel to the next suburb ready for this weekend. The knitters have their biennial exhibition. Everyone is supposed to contribute something for the display. In my case that means that my father also got busy and is, we think, contributing some wooden buttons, boxes, pens, shawl pins etc for sale. Proceeds will, if we get that far, go to supporting a friend who runs a refugee centre for children in Africa.
Knowing all this someone offered to provide transport for the goods in question. I accepted because it was more than I could carry alone and, ultimately, the benefit is for someone other than myself.
That someone was supposed to collect yesterday afternoon, ready for set up late in the day. That same someone did not appear. We have not heard a word. Now yes, they may be ill or they may have had an accident but half a dozen other people were also aware of the arrangement. Nobody appeared. I do not have mobile 'phone numbers for any of them and there is an hour in the evening after which I do not disturb others with 'phone calls - not even family - if I can avoid it. We tried the taxi option only to be told that there was at least a ninety minute wait and that one could not be guaranteed - something was happening somewhere. Family and friends who might have done it are on the sick list or at soccer practice with the grandchildren.
So, I gave up. Today my father will put some on his gopher. I will put some in the tricycle basket and the rest in my ancient back pack and we will take what we can down there ourselves. It is a little late. There will be grumbles about our failure to be there yesterday but I refused to negotiate rush hour traffic - or allow my father to do the same and come back in the almost dark. (If it had just been up to me I might have done it but my father is too old for such capers - or to be worrying about me doing it.)
It will be interesting to see what, if anything, is actually said today but it makes me more determined about two things. The first is that, if you say you are going to do something, you should do your best to keep your word. If you cannot, then let the person know. The second is that, if you can, it is better to be independent.