breakfast this morning. Instead I am heading out shortly for the annual visit to the vampire - otherwise known as the annual "blood test".
I don't think there is anything wrong with my blood. I certainly hope not but I know that the "blood test" can be an indicator for all sorts of other things as well so I will dutifully head off and allow a vampire to take some. I have no doubt that there will be others there waiting with me.
Now, you are supposed to fast for twelve hours before these tests...drinking water is fine but no, you are not supposed to eat anything. The vampire I have seen for the last few years (she has worked there rather a long time) has always greeted me with a sigh of relief. She knows I will not have "just had a couple of biscuits and a cup of tea at 11pm" - it is just after 8am when she is told this by a business man who should know better. She knows I am not going to have "just eaten breakfast because it can't make any difference now can it?" by a young mother. She knows I am not going to have drunk the energy drink I saw the other cyclist taking "because I was thirsty and that is all I had".
I will do the right thing because I do not like going without breakfast and I do not want to put myself through this procedure more than once. I know enough to know that those things do make a difference.
The vampire is kind to the elderly who get confused about these things or tell her that they had to eat something to take their medication. I know that. I have seen her be kind. I don't know how she handles the others - I suspect she wants to tell them off but I also suspect that she knows that sometimes their doctors don't remind them. Perhaps some of them think their patients know these things and that they don't need to be reminded. Perhaps they forget to tell them under the stress of their jobs.
Mine did not remind me. I just happen to know the rules. And my rules say, "Take a banana with you and eat it as soon as you can."