I didn't mean to do it. It's the second time in a month I have lost my temper, both times at the same venue.
It is time I stopped going to the group.
I tried to do the right thing, indeed I did what I was advised to do.
Yesterday I was descended on by two members of the group who refused to accept that I was doing the right thing. I felt threatened, so threatened I felt frightened. I should just have slunk off silently but instead I lashed out. I suppose it is what we cats do when backed into a virtual corner. Unable to reach my belongings and go quietly I had no choice but to endure some very public humiliation.
Yes, it's my fault. I should just have kept my mouth shut and my miaous to myself. I did keep my paws and claws to myself but I thought one of the two was going to not just verbally but physically assault me.
I then argued with someone else as I was collecting my things, someone I have very much liked and respected, the person who asked me to join the group many years ago. That's made matters worse.
I've never been in this sort of situation before. I am still feeling frightened by what happened.
I've apologised to everyone involved because, whatever might have happened and whoever was at fault, I could have behaved differently.
It doesn't make me feel any better. I am just feeling miserable. I just wish one of them would come and knock on the door. I'd ask her if she wanted me to put the kettle on.
I hate arguing with anyone.
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7 comments:
Oh Cat! I am sorry. Chris
Dear Cat,
I've been thinking for months that you need to stop going to this group. I haven't said anything b/c not sure if my place to give advice. But I know you, and you are a very even-tempered, extremely patient cat and if you lashed out, you were only protecting yourself.
I am so sorry you had such a horrible experience. I hope you will consider dropping out of this group that no longer gives you any good experiences.
Love from Sister Cat
I'm so sorry you had this experience. I'm sure you must feel quite shaken by it.
Love and hugs, Cat, knowing you whatever happened would not have been your fault.
Unfortunately, all groups attract trolls whether online or offline; Trolls like nothing more than conflict. I dare say this group needs you more than you need them. You don't need the stress. Life's too short. You can make the choice to walk away with your head held high. Your time and energy is better spent on activities that enhance your quality of life and do not degrade it.
Thank you all. I am going to sit quietly for now but I hope I can mend fences.
Oh, how horrible for you. I agree, walk away now. In time, the belligerent, controlling clique will move on to something else and maybe you will rejoin, but only when YOU want to. Meanwhile, you can keep in touch with some members outside the group if you'd like to. It's always sad, but reflect on all the good you've done over the years. Rock on, Cat.
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