Caring for the frail aged

is an increasing issue here - and elsewhere.  It is an issue which is not going to go away and we do need to address it. 

I suppose I have been rather conscious of it for many years. If you ride a bicycle or, in my case, a tricycle then you tend to meet the elderly. They might be out walking a dog, pushing a pram, tending a garden or doing something else. These are the people you meet first. It might be a smile or hello and, somehow, it progresses from there to "nice day" or "we need some rain". With some people, perhaps most people, it goes no further. With others it is casual conversation and eventually a sort of friendship. You find out where they live and drop off a plant or, on a hot day, tell them not to walk all the distance to the shops but you will do it for them and they can pay you when you get back. Eventually you find yourself dropping prescriptions in to the chemist and more.

I have had Power of Attorney over the affairs of two such people. They had nobody else. I have dealt with shopping, banking, medical appointments and more. I know other people who do the same for their neighbours or people "down the street" or "around the corner". We still live in something which is not quite a village but where some of us still know one another. It is changing and I am sorry that it is. The Covid19 virus did bring people together for a while but too many people are reverting to their old habits and the elderly are once again being left behind. 

And some of them are moving into residential care because there is nobody to care for them and their needs are too great. I have become extremely conscious of this again as we go in and out to see the Senior Cat. I suppose the place does the best it can but it isn't home of course. I pass rooms where tiny old ladies are slumped in chairs asleep. The television is constantly on. Nobody visits them. 

Middle Cat and I see the Visitors' Book all the time. More than once I have been in to see that the person ahead of me was Middle Cat the day before or a name I recognise as being a priest or church visitor. There is almost never anyone else. 

They don't make it easy to visit of course. 'Flu vaccination certificate? Yes. Not everyone has one of those of course. Not everyone is aware of the need for one. Doctors grumble at the extra work of writing one. You are supposed to ring and make an appointment to go in. Middle Cat and I simply phone about half an hour beforehand and tell them we are coming. If there was illness in the place that would be different but visitors are rare. Each time you go in there is a form to fill out. You get your temperature taken and so on. 

I went in yesterday to take some things the Senior Cat needs to do "a little magic show" for the residents (and any staff who can sneak off I suspect) tomorrow. There was nobody in reception when they buzzed me in. I took my own temperature - 35.8 thank you - and filled out the form and used the hand sanitiser. I went past the sleeping ladies and the person with the laundry trolley. I handed in the medication they wanted for the Senior Cat.

I found him dozing in his room and woke him up. He claimed not to be asleep but I know he can and does snooze often. It is one of those things you do at 97. All the same once he was awake he was alert and we looked at something he wanted to do tomorrow. He discarded it as "not safe for some of the dementia patients". 

That done he inquired whether I brought any singlets. He did not seem to have any. I was taken aback by this. His pyjama pants have gone missing too. I sighed inwardly. We knew this was likely to happen. We said we would do his laundry because of it. There are three singlets missing, a shirt, the pyjama pants and two odd socks - handknitted socks. Middle Cat will try and investigate. She is better at such things. 

Knowing full well we are unlikely to see such things again though I have bought two new singlets - thankfully half price this week! I have found the school like name tapes I bought to mark his brother's clothing. Middle Cat has said she will sew them on. We will emphasise again that we will do his laundry. They might not get lost. I am not holding my breath.

These are the little things. The very old among us need more than that though - and we are not giving them what they need.