lost - or is it?
In one of those odd little coincidences there is a piece in the paper this morning about letter writing - just as I was about to write an actual letter to someone.
My mother was an excellent letter writing. She found the physical act of writing easy. Her handwriting was very clear and easy to read. It was probably just as well. There was a time in her life when she wrote seven letters a week to family alone.
She would write once to her mother on Sunday evenings. It would be a "long" letter, several pages. It was what her mother expected of her, anything less would have been met with sulks and "you don't love me". It was easier to give in and keep the uneasy truce between them.
Mum also wrote to us. Three of us were away at school and university by then. Those letters were short, usually not more than a page. They were intended to inform us about anything we needed to know. There would be snippets of other information in there. If I saw my siblings I was expected to share that information with them.
Mum also wrote other letters at Christmas and then more letters to people like her closest friend who as also my godmother. I do not know how often some of those letters were written but I know they were written because I sometimes saw the responses come. They were of the generation for whom writing letters was the normal way of corresponding.
One of my tasks in the last week was to write two short pieces for someone at the local church. She is apparently responsible for their "people of the parish" project. She asked me if I would contribute a piece about my parents and another about someone else I knew quite well. My mother had kept in touch by letter with M,... when, in old age, M... left to be close to family. After Mum died I continued to write to her about once a month. M... liked to know what some of her then very elderly friends were doing. Unlike Mum I typed my letters. I will type the one I write to L... too. But... it will still be an actual letter with a stamp.
I think there is a difference. Of course I could email L... but a letter is different. It is tangible. That matters. L... can keep them if she wants to do so. They will not get lost in the endless bills, reminders, demands and other not-so-important mail which appears on a screen. If L... wants to keep them they will be there for her children and even grandchildren.
When my brother moved interstate with his family Mum continued to write each week. He tells me he has kept the letters. I hope he has. I moved too many times to keep the letters written to me. I tried but it did not happen. Mum actually threw out the boxes I brought home with me. She thought I would not need them. They might have been useful
I have no doubt at all that one reason for the close family connections in the Senior Cat's family was due to the way his paternal grandmother wrote so many letters. If they had been kept they would have been a treasure trove of information. We have a few though. They are in a clear, determined hand. I have no doubt her children wrote back. It would have been expected of them.
Email is not the same. I may need to type my letters but, if I could, I would want to write them in the same clear copperplate script of my paternal great-grandmother.