Friday, 29 May 2015

Move over Sepp Blatter

because I am coming to take your job. 
I know nothing about football or soccer or whatever you care to call it but I still think I could do a better job of it than you or any of those over-fed and over-paid people around you. Somewhere along the line you forgot that this game was supposed to be just that - a game.
Downunder put in a bid to host the World Cup under the previous government. I think it cost them about $45m to put the bid up and am I right in saying they got just one vote? Whatever, they didn't win and probably never had any chance of winning. It was an expensive publicity stunt for the government of the day and the money would have been better spent on buying soccer balls for the kids. 
The cost of putting in a bid should have had alarm bells ringing a long time ago. How much money does it really take to make a bid? Who's involved? Perhaps it is time to put a limit on the costs and the number of people involved? You don't like that? Why not?
Now, that great big fancy building you have in Switzerland...yes, that's the one I mean. You don't need it. I run a global project from home  - from a desk in the corner of the room I sleep in to be exact. I am sure that you can manage on less - after all, aren't the boys outside playing with a ball?
Oh and all those meetings around the conferencing? 
On site visits? Employ some back packers? They can send some pictures on their phones and i-pads in return for a couple of nights in a youth hostel. 
Sponsorship? Strictly to help those who actually need it, not to house someone's cats in a New York apartment all of their own. (The cats would prefer a place on a farm.) 
And that is just a start Herr Blatter. I am sure I can think of some other savings. Corruption? Any evidence of it and you will be banned for life.
You see Herr Blatter, this football/soccer thing - it's just a game. I'll come along and take over and sort this thing out. 
What am I charging? The basic wage plus the cheapest accommodation near the office will do nicely thank you. 


Helen Devries said...

You have my vote.

catdownunder said...

Thank you. Apparently my services were not required but I am watching him :)

Anonymous said...


You are over qualified for the job ... honesty is not required for the job!