Tuesday 17 April 2018

"Ten things your child should do

before your age of ten - or something like that," he told me. Then he went on, "I'm getting sick of being told what my kid should do."
I waited.
"There was something in the paper and then we got this from his teacher. It's like we don't know he needs experiences but we haven't got time to do it. G (his mother) and I  work full time. We have to get him to football and gym and music and the b....birthday parties at weekends. He's got no time either. He already gets a heap of homework..."
I can't remember the rest but the father ranted on for several minutes. I also have no doubt that there would be many other parents who would agree with him.
Yes, there was a piece in the paper the other day about things children should be able to experience - things like climbing trees, building cubby houses, catching tadpoles, riding a bike - and falling off. Too many children don't experience those things any more. 
It isn't just about time. There is the same amount of time in a week that there was when I was a child. People just use it differently. 
It does have something to do with the fear parents now have of their children being injured or molested, bullied or otherwise subjected to harm. You don't simply tell them to "go outside and play" any more. You apparently need to be there to supervise them. They need to be constantly watched. It is safer to have them inside so that you know where they are. 
Or do you? There's still the screen time - the television, the computer, the phone with the internet connection and more. 
The subject has been under discussion in this house too. Someone the Senior Cat knows has, with the best of intentions, had an idea she wants to use as a fundraiser for charity. She has talked to the Senior Cat about this as it would involve some woodworking skills - something she doesn't have and would need to acquire. There would be some major issues to overcome before it could happen but, as the Senior Cat was telling me, I was thinking of another issue. When he had finished telling me about his conversation and his concerns I said, "And it is something children should be making for themselves."
He nodded and said, "Yes, I thought that too - but can you see it happening?"
No, it isn't likely. 
Of course there are children who "do" things like that. There's a human interest piece in the paper this morning about a young boy who has made a detailed Lego model of one the city's theatres. It is so well done it is on display in another theatre right now. On Saturday I will be teaching a class and, elsewhere on the same premises, there will be a group of very young embroiderers learning skills that will otherwise be lost. They are constantly being encouraged to be creative. On that same day Ms W will probably begin work on a plan she has for a very tiny village. G..., who is about the same age, will almost certainly spend some time creating earrings or making more of the pom-pom cushion she has designed herself. Next week I have promised to teach a teenage boy how to read a Japanese crochet pattern. He makes the most amazing puppets. He can knit, sew, cook and use all manner of woodworking tools. "I plan on being a husband one day - one who can do things," he once told me. Good for him,
But there will be far too many children who will never find out what it is like to really do things, who will never find out what it is like to learn through failure and try again.
I could only agree with the person who apparently wrote the list of ten things - indeed more than that - of things all children should experience.
Remember getting filthy dirty, cold, wet - and happy because you finally climbed into your tree house?

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