Learning to listen

is important. 
I had a long session on the phone yesterday. Someone else needed to talk. It was the second such conversation in the day. (I hope the man who is supposed to call us about the leaking tank did not give up in disgust at what must have been an almost constant engaged signal.)
Later I thought about both conversations.  One of them was about equal I suppose - equal in that we both had about the same amount to say. The other meant I said very little. The other person needed to talk...and talk...and then talk some more. 
I let her go on. She needed to say things. I didn't agree with most of what she was saying and I know most people she knows won't agree with her either. I am hoping that having said it all to me once she will bother other people less - although I rather doubt it.
While I was letting her talk I could, because of modern technology, do some things one handed - things like clearing away the week's collection of papers.
Afterwards the Senior Cat said to me,
     "Well at least you could do something. You couldn't have done anything if she had been here."
No, I couldn't have done anything. I wouldn't even have been able to pick up my knitting. She wouldn't have understood that at all. She doesn't knit.
The person who had rung me earlier does knit. She would have brought her knitting with her if she expected to sit and talk. We have had some quite serious conversations over knitting.
But even for her there are times when I would cease knitting and just listen.  
I have had to learn this over the years - and keep reminding myself about it. It is important to listen to what someone is saying. It is not just enough to hear what they are saying. Really listening requires more than that. 
I was listening to the first person. I asked questions. She asked me some. She told me things. I told her things. I wanted to know what she was telling me. There was some useful feedback about something I had done and I told her something she didn't know but needed to know. It was a good conversation.
I was hearing the second person and I could even tell you what she had been talking about and what she was thinking but I ignored the minute details. They simply weren't relevant to what she was telling me. 
It would have been much more difficult face to face. I would have needed to stop doing everything and looked as if I was giving her my complete attention. It would have been extremely difficult to be patient with her, not to argue.
I need to hone my listening/hearing skills again.