If you want to live in this country

then please do not expect me to wear the clothing you expect women in your country of origin to wear. Also, please do not expect me to support your views on the conflicts in the Middle East, your religion, your views about women failing to marry and woment working outside the home. 

If I entered your home here I would remove my footwear but I would do so becaus it is your home here, your personal space. I would be your guest. Outside that space you are either a resident of this country or you are a guest. As a resident of this country you are expected to abide by the customs of this country. As a guest you are asked to be polite and accepting of those customs. 

You are free to practice your religion here. You are not free to expect me to do the same. I have my own beliefs but I will not attempt to convert you to those beliefs. 

Not all women in your country of origin marry and some of them do manage to have careers outside the home. This is how I came to learn about the nephew you are demanding I help. 

Yes, yesterday I was introduced to someone who is here on a visa of some sort. He was looking for help for a child in his extended family. I was told "nephew" but the relationship seems to be something else. 

I did not take to this man. He wanted me to cover my head and not wear "men's clothing". I could not speak to his wife because she must remain at home and he could not make a time on any Friday or Saturday or at certain times of the day during the rest of the week. 

I will help because it is my job to help but I want to do it on my terms.  You may be able to walk the streets and I might guess you are possibly from somewhere in the Middle East and quite likely from a conflict zone.  It is when your wife must follow you, dressed head to toe in back with her head bowed and her face covered I know it is even more likely. I accept this may be the way things are in your country of origin. I do not have to approve of it.

I can accept it is how women are treated in your country but I do not have to like it. I do not have to do as you say here. If you want my help then it will be on my terms. If you want to live in this country then you will need to accept that. It does not make me "racist" or "intolerant".