Tuesday 18 April 2017

Prince Harry speaking out on mental health

has probably done more good than all the "experts" who tell people to seek help.
Prince Harry is seen as "privileged" of course. He is one of those people who is supposed to "have everything". It's supposed to be "easy" for him. He "doesn't have to work".
Hold it right there. He isn't privileged. He was born into a family that has a position in society which makes it difficult to actually do anything at all without being under scrutiny. What's more he doesn't have everything - far from it.
He doesn't have his mother. I'll come back to that in a moment. He doesn't have the freedom to "just hop in the car and go out for a meal". Everything gets planned ahead. He is expected to attend events that must bore the socks off him - and his family. He is expected to meet and greet people - and always, but always, be polite to people. He works. Yes, he does work. It hasn't just been army service either. He attends meetings. He makes decisions. He makes speeches. He listens to people. He has to be a diplomat at all times.
And  yes, he does it without his mother. I liked his mother. I am going to be totally upfront here and say I met his mother on more than one occasion...before she married. We met over small children. I was doing research. She was caring for them. I thought of her as a "caring" person too. The children she was caring for liked her - and small children tend to be instinctively the best judges of what an adult is really like. Children went to Prince Harry's mother - and she listened to them. It wasn't the halfhearted  listening that is so common among adults. She concentrated on what they were telling her. We talked too, about the research I was doing, about the way children grew up in Downunder, about stories children liked, and much more.
I wonder how many of the children remember her now? How many remember the way she listened? I suspect a lot of them do. I am sure Prince Harry does. I am sure his brother does. It will be one of the things they miss the most.
I have been fortunate in that I have had two people in my life that I could talk to on occasion. One was my paternal grandmother and the other was an indigenous woman who mothered me in my teens and became a very close friend. They are both long deceased  - and I still miss them. I didn't talk to my mother in the way I talked to them. My siblings didn't either. Our mother simply wasn't that sort of person. Not all mothers have that intense, close relationship with their children - although many do. 
Most of us though need someone like that. When you lose someone like that at an early age then you need support from other people. You might look as if you are "coping" but that isn't enough. 
So Prince Harry speaking out was important. It told the world, "it may look as if I have everything but I still need someone to listen to me. I am not totally self-sufficient. I am not an island with everything I need in it".
If by some odd unlikely chance I ever meet Prince Harry I hope I can tell him how his mother listened.

2 comments:

Momkatz said...

Thank you for sharing your experiences with Princess Diana. It seemed to me that wherever she went, children and the downtrodden flocked to her. They could see her kindness and feel her good heart.

Prince Harry was so young when he lost his mother and I can't imagine his father was much help to him, "stiff upper lip" and all. I think he has had a rough go of it his whole life. I am glad he is speaking out.

USA Sister Cat

hd said...

He (Prince Harry) has been well known at school to listen to others, always do his share and more, help others. He was mentioned often and well respected by Sandhurst when I worked there.

And you are right about his life. None of them have any. Unlike some of the "rich & infamous" the British Royalty (with perhaps the exception of his father) have always taken their duties and worked unceasingly on behalf of the people of the UK.

I wish I could say the same of the (i....) currently allegedly in charge of my country who doesn't know how to put anything ahead of his immediate needs and wants.

Prince Harry has, does and will make a differnce