Helping the elderly shower

is a challenge.
I am hoping the Senior Cat's lovely "shower person" is back on duty tomorrow. (She is currently on holiday.) Her note with the dates is under a magnet on our 'fridge.
Middle Cat and I have been doing the task in between. Middle Cat may have more idea than me although the Senior Cat has muttered (very softly) to me that she is "bossy". I suspect she is. Most physiotherapists of my acquaintance, and I know more than a few, are inclined to be bossy. It means that most of the time the task has fallen to me.
The Senior Cat needs help now because he is unsteady on his rear paws, very unsteady. He needs to sit in the shower. He needs help to wash his back. 
I know he prefers S....., the "shower person", to help. He thinks of her as a sort of nurse. I suspect she does have some nursing training but she comes from China and her qualifications, whatever they may be, would not be accepted here.  She's good. She's fussy and she will alert me to anything she is concerned about.
Over the summer she has had her holiday break. Last year we had a succession of other "shower people" in her absence. The Senior Cat was perfectly happy with the young girls from Kenya, the middle aged women and so on. He was not happy having a male. I have to confess the male who came made me feel very uncomfortable too. I had to ask them not to send him again. 
When they phoned to ask if they could send a male - if they could fine one - I said we would cope in S....'s absence.
Well yes, we have coped but it has not been easy. The Senior Cat is not difficult, far from it. He is cooperative but he is anxious. He has a fear of falling. I don't blame him in the least. He fell and broke his leg once and of course he fell backwards and ended with that 4cm crack in his skull. His lack of dance skills was well known - much as he loved to try his beloved Scottish folk dances.
It worries me trying to help him but I am not uncomfortable about actually doing it - if you can understand the difference.
I have done it for the last time for now. Middle Cat should take over if there are public holidays on which S.... does not work.
But - I am wondering why it is that the male of the species seems incapable of washing the back of their necks as thoroughly as females?